Frequently asked questions about Kancho:
1. Is Kancho for real?
Yes it’s real. If you have read the wikipedia entry and the editorial at Gaijin Smash, and you still don’t believe that kancho doesn’t really happen, there are thousands of former English teachers who could attest to it. There are so many kancho victims out there, one of them probably lives near you and you don’t even know it.
2. Why start a site devoted to kancho?
We started this site in order to teach the world about this crazy thing called Kancho. It’s definately a good conversation starter. Ex: “Hey Bill, long time no see. You’re looking great! Hey, have you heard about this thing called kancho? It’s when a kid shoves his index fingers up your butt!” Try it and watch your popularity at office parties skyrocket.
3. What’s up with Japanese kids doing kancho? They must be weird.
Kancho is weird, but no more weird than the purple-nurple, and a lot less weird than many of the things that go on in schools in the West. So just accept it. Here at kancho.org we are not trying to put down kancho or anyone who does it. We just think it’s funny. And it’s not just Japan. They do something similar in Korea and in the Phillipines.
4. Why don’t the teachers put a stop to kancho?
They can’t. Kancho is all powerful! But seriously, they don’t need to. Teachers see it as a harmless children’s prank, which is what it is. But if it makes you really uncomfortable, you should say something.
5. Kancho makes me really uncomfortable. How can I stop my students from kanchoing me?
For elementary kids, try telling them how it makes you uncomfortable. They will usually do anything to be your friend, and if you tell them that being kanchoed makes you sad and not want to play with them, they will usually stop. For junior high kids ignoring it is probably best, but that means you will suffer a few strong kanchos before they decide that they are not going to get a reaction out of you. If high school students or adults kancho you, you are on your own.
6. Have you ever been kanchoed?
Of course we have. We have been invited to all you can kancho dinners, and were the main course. We have been sentenced to kancho by firing squad.
7. So do you support kanchoing other people?
Only if they are your friend and you have their written consent to kancho them. Kancho makes many people uncomfortable and in some regions could be considered sexual assault. If you have the expressed permission of your friend to kancho them, you have weird friends, and we still don’t really recommend kanchoing them. That said; we don’t condemn the children who do kancho. To them it is seen as a childish joke, and it should be treated as such. In fact it is often a sign of familiarity, much like patting someone on the butt in American football.
8. Isn’t it spelled kanchou?
Yes and no. The name kancho comes from the Japanese word for “enema” which is written in English as “kanchou.” But the kancho we are talking about doesn’t have its own Japanese kanji, and it’s not quite an enema, so we think a new word is in order. That’s why we say “kancho.” If there are any Japanese kanji experts reading this who would like to come up with a new kanji that is specific to the act of kanchoing someone, we would definitely support its use.
9. Should Kancho be performed with one finger, or both the index and ring finger?
In Naruto you will see the two finger style Kancho that looks more like a prayer pose. This is a stronger pose, and may protect your fingers from breaking should they encounter the tail bone. However, we find the Japanese elementary students far and away prefer the pointer finger only style reminicent of Charlie’s Angels. This may be because it affords better penetration. Feel free to try them both and see which one works for you – Kancho in comfort.